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After publishing a recent article extolling the lack of virtues, not to mention ability, contained within the frames of Antonio Valencia and Raheem Sterling, we decided to have a go at picking a team made up of the most overrated Premier League players from the “big six”. See if you agree with our selection or, if not, then let us know who we have missed or who you would pick. So here it is, a potential relegation team:

1. Hugo Lloris
(Absolutely flabbergasting how blind both Pochettino and Deschamps are to this guy’s deficiences, and there are many of them).

2. Antonio Valencia
( Too old and slow to be a winger and, believe it or not, too thick to be a full-back. He has managed to fool both van Gaal and Mourinho into believing he is good).

3. Chris Smalling
(Is currently being selected due to injuries to other players. Clumsy, no positional sense and very wasteful on the ball. He wasn’t even good enough to get in the England World Cup squad, which says it all really).

4. Phil Jones
(Almost an accident waiting to happen except that he doesn’t wait, he makes it happen. Headless chicken, bull in a china shop, just a couple of ways his defending style has been described and both are accurate).

5. Ashley Young
(Exactly the same as Antonio Valencia).

6. Raheem Sterling
(Another who has fooled the public for a while now. The occasional decent goal doesn’t hide the fact that he has little talent. Finds it difficult to control the ball, pass it to a team mate or beat a player).

7. Jordan Henderson
( The captain of Liverpool who the manager is now beginning to realise actually isn’t very good. When everyone is fit he wouldn’t even make the bench and is another who somehow managed to gain a reputation which he has now lived on for years).

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Now that Liverpool have signed some good midfielders Henderson can’t get in the team

8. Eric Dier
(Went through a short period when he wasn’t too bad but has now lost his place in the Spurs team and doesn’t look like getting it back. Two things happened which, as far as we are concerned, proved he was no better than average. Firstly he was called up to the England team and then José Mourinho was, reportedly, interested in buying him.)

9. Jesse Lingard
(Similar in a lot of respects to Sterling. Runs around a lot which today’s managers seem to love. Loses control, falls over, gives the ball away but scores some decent goals. As we said, just like Sterling).

10.Álvaro Morata
(There just had to be a Chelsea player in here didn’t there? He gets in this team purely because he’s a goalscorer who isn’t scoring goals. He is one whereby nobody can argue whether or not he is overrated because he proves it almost every time he plays).

11.Romelu Lukaku
(Despite his goals he is, in every other aspect of the game, an average player. For such a tall man he wins very little in the air. For such a strong man he is useless at holding up the ball. His close control is weak and his right foot is for standing on only. When he doesn’t score he brings nothing to the team, despite what his manager may say).

The eagle-eyed amongst you will have noticed that there are a fair few Manchester United players in this team. That is because they have more overrated players than any other team in the Premier League. That is also why they are currently tenth in the division whilst the rest of the “big six” are where you would expect them to be.

As we said, let us know below if you have a “better” overrated team or maybe you would just change a player or two.

And finally…..

So gawpy Gareth has signed a new contract. If nothing else this should provide continuity for the team. They will continue to struggle and lose against teams who are ranked lower in the world than themselves.

They will continue to live under the illusion that they are good. They will continue, despite Southgate’s assurances to the contrary, to select players who can’t get into their club side because, if they don’t, they will then struggle to field a good team.

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Southgate celebrates his new contract, a reward for failing to reach the World Cup final despite having an easier route than everybody except Croatia

There are very strong indications that this contract was renewed because there is nobody else available for the job or, more likely, nobody else who would want to do it.

That being the case we have to salute Mr Southgate who has obviously had a change of heart after saying, only recently, that he wanted to return to club management. Maybe he has worked out that he wasn’t very good at that either. Anyway, he is in charge for another four years at least, unless he does a “Big Sam” which is highly unlikely as butter probably wouldn’t melt in the Southgate mush.

Good luck to him because, you mark our words, he will need it.

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Comments
  1. Kay says:

    In my opinion, most of the players in your list are not overrated, they are just outright bad players, especially the Manchester United players.
    It does not seem they are rated at all. The overrated ones might just be Sterling, Lingard and probably Dier.

    Like

  2. pauleee says:

    To be fair, Morata’s ability to shoot and hit the goalkeeper with such pin-point accuracy is uncanny. No matter where the keeper tries to hide, he’ll find him and place the ball right at his hands. I dare say he may be the best in the world at this.

    Like

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