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Poor Alvaro Morata. Fresh from dyeing his hair red and his wife following Manchester United on Instagram he now has to pretend that Chelsea was always his first choice.

He hasn’t actually said those words but, then again, his English isn’t too good yet.

On arrival at Heathrow airport the player and his wife were immediately hijacked by a Sky Sports reporter who wasted no time in asking those pertinent questions to which we all want an answer.

Why have you chosen Chelsea?” asked stupid reporter, who is probably naive enough to think that Morata actually had a choice!

Because they are the best club,” lied Morata, who, were he to be truthful, would have said, “because United didn’t think I was worth the money and only Chelsea were daft enough to pay it.”

What attracted you to the Premier League?” was stupid question number two from stupid reporter.

Again, owing to the absence of a “whole truth and nothing but the truth” serum, Morata said, “it’s one of the best leagues in the world,” which is quite true but not why he “chose it.” What he meant to say was that he had NO choice as the only club prepared to pay his fee was in the Premier League.

After this embarrassing episode Morata dashed off to find his wife who had long ago decided that Sky reporters were to be avoided even more than a mosquito infested millpond.

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In other news, West Ham United have agreed a fee with Bayer Leverkusen for Javier Hernandez and, providing all goes well, he will be wearing the claret and blue next season.

It will be good to see him back in the Premier League but it does raise a question for us Manchester United supporters. José Mourinho has said that, had he been manager when Hernandez was still at Old Trafford, he wouldn’t have sold him. If that is true then why didn’t he buy him back? The figure being bandied around as a fee is only £13 million, for a player with another three or four years at the top?

Good business by Slaven Bilic and good luck to West Ham. We only hope he doesn’t score more goals than Romelu Lukaku, that would be more embarrassing than being asked stupid questions by a Sky Sports News reporter.

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Meanwhile, Manchester City, who are trying to buy lots of players before they get banned from doing so, are in danger of being reported to the top brass for tapping up Monaco players. According to the “French” club, Kylian M’Bappe, who appears to be in demand, has been spoken to when he shouldn’t have been spoken to and this, in football, is a crime.

It is unlikely that anything will come of it as Monaco are currently pocketing millions of Abu Dhabi/Mancunian pounds having sold Bernardo Silva to City and are in the process of probably pocketing even more by selling Benjamin Mendy to them as well.

In other news, there is no other news. Tottenham, Arsenal, Liverpool, who want Thomas Muller now that £66 million isn’t enough for Naby Keita, Manchester United and even Everton, have gone very quiet recently.

This situation will not last as the race to see who can spend the most money, (the answer to which is usually; the one who has the most money), begins to heat up before reaching absolute boiling point by the end of August, at which time Jim White will spontaneously combust, hopefully before having the chance to irritate the heck out of us on deadline day.

(Do Sky Sports News have ANY presenters who do not have a grating, whining voice or is it part of the job description?)

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