Manchester United, City, Liverpool And The Rest Prepare For The Big Summer Event!

Posted: April 14, 2018 in Arsenal, Chelsea, Football, Liverpool, Manchester City, Manchester United, Opinion, Premier League, Tottenham Hotspur, Transfers
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Not long to go now! Soon that pesky football season will be over and we can get down to the serious business! It’s something that the true football fans have been longing for and it will be arriving before we know it!

What’s that? The World Cup, we hear you say? No, not all. This is something far bigger than some overblown tournament held in a country run by a latter-day Mussolini. This is not something which can be compared to the 1936 Berlin Olympics as the idiot who is Boris Johnson famously did with this year’s competition for the no-longer-called Jules Rimet trophy.

No, this transcends even the globalest of global events and has football supporters glued to everything media-friendly from the TV screen to the iPad, from the radio to the smartphone. This will keep the average fan’s attention for two months, not just four short weeks. Not only that, but this event occurs twice per season EVERY season, that’s how popular it is.

Yes, it’s the transfer window folks! It’s almost time to hope that some of the rumours are true and pray that some of them are not. It’s getting to the point where those unwanted players can finally be shown the door and prove that they can become someone else’s wanted players.


Chris Smalling – Celebrates having made a clean tackle!

Chris Smalling can finally fulfill the majority of United supporter’s wishes and leave Old Trafford. Luke Shaw can, at last, end his on/mainly off relationship with José Mourinho and go somewhere he will be loved, like his mum’s house.

Pep Guardiola can buy some new full backs, a centre half and a defensive midfielder to add to his collection because he still doesn’t have enough, according to him.

Antonio Conte and Stubborn Old Man can share the cost of a big white horse and ride off into the sunset together with one leaving his club to conduct transfer business without him, as they always did anyway, and the other possibly returning in a role which could mean his nose being involved in the comings and goings more than ever!

Then again, he may just return to France!

Jürgen Klopp can buy a goalkeeper. After making his former number two his now number one he is finding out that his defence has only improved thanks to the signing of Virgil van Dijk and not through any brilliant managerial decisions regarding the goalkeeping position. Loris Karius will revert to being his number two and Simon Mignolet will revert to complaining to anybody who will listen!

Mauricio Pochettino will spend his waking hours and, probably, some of his sleeping ones trying to convince Dastardly Daniel Levy that he needs to spend some money on players. New ones, old ones, he isn’t too fussed but some contracts need sorting which will mean pay increases and new players need to be brought in, which means an attractive salary has to be on offer.


Dastardly Dan – Pondering on whether he should award himself a pay-rise just for being such a good egg!

Currently, at Tottenham, the most attractive salary is that of Levy himself and goes a long way to explaining why there isn’t much left in the budget for players. Still, looking after number one is a decent way to live life especially when you’re the head honcho and nobody can tell you any different!

And finally…..

As far as the wannabes outside of the top six are concerned and, in this instance, we are referring to Burnley and Everton, they will carry on as usual.

Sean Dyche will spend whatever he finds down the back of the sofa and may even raid the kids money-box. He will buy another unknown gem because his scouting system works and will then make a massive profit when selling him on in a year or two to one of the big clubs whose scouting system doesn’t work!

As for Big Sam, he may well be asking if there is any room on the white horse which will be carrying Antonio and Arséne out of town.

Next year’s surprise package for the top six? Newcastle United, but only if they are taken over by somebody with money AND common sense, a very rare combination.


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