Archive for the ‘Louis van Gaal’ Category


Recently I have been reading that the last three results have turned Louis van Gaal into such a good manager that Manchester United couldn’t bear to see him leave at the end of the season and would like him to stay on for his contracted final year.

The last three results have been the Europa League win over FC Midtjylland, who would just about survive the first division in England, followed by a good 3-2 win over Arsenal, who were abysmal and ending in a very fortuitous 1-0 win over Watford, a game in which they were lucky Watford didn’t score three.

With the exception of the Arsenal game, the other two again papered over the cracks and certainly made van Gaal look a lot better than he really is. The problem when this happens is that some people actually believe he is good, only for a short while, but long enough for the damage to be done.

Louis van Gaal has, basically, had his day. He cannot live with the modern game, particularly in the Premier League where he has never managed before. He is far too arrogant to admit it and prefers to rely completely on excuses when his team loses. (more…)



Well, after this result at the Hawthorns, we have learnt something more about Louis van Gaal or, should I say, a previous theory has been confirmed.

When he has a lot of injuries and selection is not a very complicated process the team have been getting results. He hasn’t had the luxury of being able to mess around with formations or philosophies etc. He has had to pick whatever has been available and run with it. This had proven to be quite successful recently.

So, now a couple of the more experienced players are back from injury, why would you change a winning formula? I certainly don’t know, it is a question for the arrogant Dutchman to answer.

Of course, there was no way of knowing that a normally reasonably intelligent player like Juan Mata would decide to become stupid for a ten minute period during which he managed to collect two yellow cards. This was obviously never going to help the cause. He was, however, not one of the returning injured and had played throughout the good spell, so his dismissal, while stupid should not have been terminal. (more…)


They make a living, nothing more. They are not original and spend their career copying somebody who was original. If this seems a trifle parasitic, it is because that’s exactly what it is.

There are tribute acts for Queen, Bon Jovi, Abba, Take That and Guns ‘n’ Roses, to name but a few. Rarely, if ever, seen on TV these bands are destined to play the pubs and clubs throughout Europe. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride.

I am not saying these acts are totally talentless, I guess they must be able to play a musical instrument and sing a bit, but they are devoid of any originality, relying on others to do all the hard work.

David Moyes was the first manager to try a Manchester United tribute team. They wore the same colours as the Ferguson originals and they even managed to win a few games. The problem was that nobody really thought of them as being the real thing. (more…)


Louis van Gaal is still sitting on the throne at Manchester United.

Nobody really understands why, apart from maybe Ed Woodward. Van Gaal should have been van Gone weeks ago.

As I have already chronicled it makes no sense to keep him until United can mathematically win nothing or qualify for the Champion’s League. Let him go, put him out of his misery. More to the point, put the long suffering supporters out of their misery. Give Mourinho or Giggs a shot at the remainder of the season, it can’t really get worse!

The problem has been evident to everybody except van Gaal and Woodward for quite a while. In fact, the penny does now seem to have finally dropped with van Gaal. He’s suddenly turned into David Moyes in the way he is doubting that United will achieve fourth position or better.

He is certainly achieving very little more than Moyes did and is currently worse off, having spent around £187 million more, than his predecessor. (more…)



So, Louis van Gaal would feel betrayed if Manchester United were speaking to Jose Mourinho about the manager’s position at United, would he? He has just led United to a defeat at Sunderland which leaves them six points away from the top four who all now have a game in hand. The chances of finishing in the top four are now very remote so, therefore, his spending of £258 million on new players was both wasteful and unwise.

As a United supporter of more than fifty years I would feel completely betrayed if United WEREN’T talking to Jose Mourinho, I couldn’t care less what van Gaal thinks! He is not the man for Manchester United and the only people who don’t understand this are van Gaal himself and Ed Woodward.

Just to be straight, I have absolutely no time for Ed Woodward who, since amazingly being placed in charge of football matters, has overseen one disaster after another.

Starting with the appointment of David Moyes, a man with no big club experience and no trophy winning experience, through the purchase of Marouane Fellaini for £4 million more than was necessary due to a missed release clause, it continued with the joke that was the Angel Di Maria transfer, the sacking of Moyes AFTER it became mathematically impossible to finish fourth or better, giving the next manager no chance of a relatively successful start. (more…)


(Scholesy reacts to the news that, according to one expert, everything negative about United is his fault!)

Does the madness of King Louis show no sign of abating? Fresh from blaming his players for not rewarding themselves in the draw against Chelsea, he now blames Paul Scholes for anything negative in the camp, or on the bus, or in the dressing room.

The article explaining all this is in the Daily Telegraph and can be found here.

In a game where United looked reasonably comfortable until HE changed the shape and brought on three subs, which automatically gave the initiative to Chelsea, the end result should have been a 0-1 to the Reds. HE messed it up and then set about blaming the players for not following his instructions and giving the ball away and not defending properly.

He was right about losing possession and not defending but these were the players HE had picked, HE had trained all week and HE had become acquainted with over the last eighteen months. If he still does not know what they are going to do in a game, after all this time, then it is definitely Mourinho time. (more…)

Manchester United manager Louis van Gaal

(Louis adopts the pose which would immediately endear him to the majority of  Manchester United fans!)

He’s a card is old Louis! You have to admire him really. After all, once his fleeting visit to these shores is over, who will fill the void left by his departure? Is there any other self-confessed genius who could step into the role? Well actually, yes there is, there’s Jose Mourinho but that’s another story.

Fresh from snatching a draw from the jaws of victory against Chelsea at Stamford Bridge, Louis was immediately looking for scapegoats. Was it HIS team selection? Never! What about HIS tactics? No chance, perish the thought! How about players not following HIS instructions? Now, there’s a possibility. And, if the players don’t follow the manager’s instructions who’s fault is that? The players of course, according to King Louis. He is the manager, he can do no wrong, he can only do right!

Having taken off Marouane Fellaini, who had chugged his way through the game like a Belgian Thomas The Tank Engine and replacing him with Morgan Schneiderlin, the United players set about trying to defend their one goal lead. They did this by the further substitutions of Memphis Depay, on for Lingard and Ander herrera, who came on for Juan Mata.

The substitutions had a very negative effect in that United immediately started giving the ball back to Chelsea as soon as they won it. (more…)


Manchester United beating Derby County in the FA Cup at the iPro stadium was greeted by fans as a return of decent football.

The fact that Derby County occupy fifth place in the Championship and have lost their previous five games is, to a large extent, irrelevant. As is often said, you can only beat what is put in front of you.

The Cup competitions have a levelling effect. Derby, for one game, could give everything. They didn’t have to worry about dropping points, or whether or not a draw would be a good result, they could just concentrate on trying to win a one-off game of football, (unless there was a replay, of course). The fact that the game was against Manchester United just put the icing on the cake. So really, they were in a no-lose situation. A win would have put the cherry on top of the icing on the cake!

In truth they didn’t play particularly well, a fact emphasised by the scoreline, which was a reasonably fair reflection of the game.

Inevitably, the question will now arise, can Manchester United win the FA Cup?
The short answer is, yes, anybody CAN win the FA Cup. Maybe the question should be WILL they win it? That is the more difficult to answer. (more…)


(Rasputin would have been proud of Louis’ survival instincts!)

Grigory Efimovich Rasputin was a Russian peasant, known as the “Mad Monk”, although he only spent three months in a monastery. He claimed he had powers of mystic healing and prediction. Using these powers he somehow contrived to heal the Royal family’s son of haemophilia. This elevated him into being accepted by Tsar Nicholas II and his wife Tsarina Aleksandra as, after four girls, this was their only son and heir who’s life he had saved.

The problem was that it made the other high-powered natives restless. They thought that Rasputin was using his new found influence to run Russia as the Tsarina was a really big fan and hung onto his every word. So they decided to do what was always decided to do back then, they decided to get rid of him.

After poisoning him with potassium cyanide, shooting him three times, (once in the head hitting the brain, once in the chest hitting the stomach and liver and once in the back hitting the kidneys), and beating him with a 2lb dumbell they finally managed to kill him by tying him up and throwing him over a bridge into the nearby river. Even then he only died because the river froze over him while he was unconscious, as they didn’t bother to weigh him down with anything!

2016 will be the one hundredth anniversary of his death so it seems only fitting to say a few words about the reincarnated version of Rasputin, namely Aloysius Paulus Maria van Gaal. (more…)


A month which saw Manchester United start with an undeserved win against Swansea saw them finish with a deserved defeat against Southampton.

In between these two matches they had undeservedly beaten a first division side in the FA Cup, thrown away the lead twice away at Newcastle and undeservedly beaten Liverpool at Anfield.

The only surprising aspect of the month of January is that United won ANY games. Their play, with the possible exception of the game at Newcastle, was abject throughout and it is amazing that anybody should think the pressure on van Gaal has eased.

I have just sat through yet another 90 minutes of unadulterated boredom. I have watched a Southampton player being given the man of the match award at Old Trafford, not because Southampton won, but because no United player would have been in the first ten!

I have watched an abject performance from Jesse Lingard, yet he stayed on the pitch for the full ninety minutes. Juan Mata started on the bench! Would somebody please explain to me how he can be left out yet Fellaini and Lingard can be selected? Don’t tell me it’s tactical, because van Gaal evidently does not know the meaning of the word. (more…)