Arise Sir Joe Aguero!

Posted: November 20, 2015 in Football, Manchester City, Opinion, Premier League
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(Sir Joe celebrates on learning he has now been injury-free for half an hour!)

David Silva, Vincent Kompany and Wilfried Bony are the three main casualties for Manchester City. Samir Nasri is a longer term injury. Fortunately they have a decent replacement for Bony as Sergio Aguero is fit for the game against Liverpool at the French looking Etihad.

Now that City have Kevin De Bruyne to pull some strings, Silva isn’t missed as much as he once was. Make no mistake though, City are a better team with Silva than they are without him.

Vincent Kompany also isn’t the miss he used to be. Since buying Nicolas Otamendi and the return to form of Eliaquim Mangala City actually have an embarrassment of riches in the middle of defence where once, whenever Kompany was missing, they just had an embarrassment. Read the rest of this entry »

Van Gaal Has To Be The Tinkerman Now

Posted: November 20, 2015 in Football, Louis van Gaal, Managers, Manchester United, Opinion, Premier League
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(Ryan Giggs points out that playing De Gea as a striker doesn’t seem to be working)

So van Gaal has enough strikers at Manchester United. Did he actually say that, or am I remembering it differently?

In the August transfer window everybody pointed out that he needed a full back, which he bought, (Matteo Darmian, lest ye forget), a centre back, which he left off his own personal list, although reports say that he tried to get Mats Hummels. A world renowned top class striker, so he bought Anthony Martial. He might not have been world renowned but his price was. He looks, in fairness, as though he is going to be worth it. He was also a little short in midfield, so he went supermarket shopping and bought thirty new midfielders as a job lot.

Now anybody who has read any of my ramblings before will know my feelings about meaningless international friendlies. Nothing gets learnt, players get injured. Read the rest of this entry »

To Head Or Not To Head?

Posted: November 19, 2015 in Football, Opinion, USA
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Long before I was ten I was playing football. I played in the street. I played in the school playground. I played on any grass we could find. I played for the junior school team on pitches. Sometimes the pitches were grass. Sometimes the pitches were shale. Most of the time the pitches were mud. Thick mud which stuck to your boots and took ages to clean off. Then, in winter, the mud froze. We still played, even though it was now like playing on concrete. We didn’t wear gloves or tights even though it was freezing cold weather.

We didn’t get tired. Well, maybe a little after a six hour game in the street with no half time.

Then there was the ball. Ah, that wonderful ball with it’s wonderful memories. Affectionately known as a “casey” due to it being a thick orange rubber balloon inside a stitched leather “case”, which after inflation, was sealed by way of laces tied together. Read the rest of this entry »

A Managerial Return Beckons For Roy Keane

Posted: November 18, 2015 in Football, Managers, Opinion
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(Roy can hardly contain his excitement following a particularly clever question from an ITV presenter)

When Roy Keane delivered the kick that effectively ended the career of Alfie Inge Haaland, I wonder if it went through his mind that, at some stage in the future he may find himself in a responsible position where he has to prevent players from doing far less than he did.

As a manager he has had a rather chequered, if short, career. Hailed as the Messiah on Wearside when he not only saved Sunderland from possible relegation, (they were in 23rd place when he took over), but got them promoted to the Premier League. His tenure did not last much longer as he left during his second season in the Premiership with Sunderland again in the relegation zone.

His next job, with Ipswich Town, was to last 20 months after which he was fired with the club occupying 19th position. Read the rest of this entry »

England And The Meaningful Friendly

Posted: November 18, 2015 in England, Football, International Football, Opinion
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This was going to be titled, ‘England and the Meaningless Friendlies, (part III).’

As anybody who follows these inane waffles will know, I have already written and published the first two parts, which question the value of these games.

However, this was not a meaningless friendly. This was one of the most meaningful friendlies played in a very long time.

It was a friendly football match that actually meant something for all the wrong reasons. It was right that it was played. Any act designed to terrorise, kill and maim people is sick enough in its own right but, to then cede more to the perpetrators by cancelling a sporting event which had been planned for a while, somehow makes it even worse, if that is at all possible. Read the rest of this entry »

Arsene Wenger’s Frustrating Game

Posted: November 16, 2015 in Arsenal, Arsene Wenger, Football, Managers, Opinion, Premier League
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(Arsene Wenger’s reaction upon hearing the news that Sir Alex Ferguson is to retire as manager of Manchester United)

Arsene Wenger’s attempt to achieve godlike status with Arsenal is faltering due to his failure to compete in the Champions League and Premier League for the last few seasons. By compete, what I mean is still be in with a realistic chance of winning both competitions in March.

Having brought in some excellent young French players in the early years, the likes of Thierry Henry, Patrick Vieira, Robert Pires, Emmanuel Petit and Sylvain Wiltord spring to mind, he has recently had to resort to spending big on famous names, with the likes of Mesut Ozil and Alexis Sanchez coming to the Emirates. Oh, I nearly forgot, and Danny Welbeck.

You get the impression that this isn’t the Arsene way. He doesn’t like to spend £40 or £50 million and only get one player, he used to expect four or five or even more for that kind of outlay. Read the rest of this entry »

Not On Sir Alex Ferguson’s Watch!

Posted: November 14, 2015 in Football, Opinion, Sir Alex Ferguson
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Over the last few years watches have become a large part of Manchester United’s sponsorship business. Hublot was followed by Bulova as United associated themselves with the finest quality timepieces.

Now, it’s time for them to run the rule over another one.

This one doesn’t profess to be the most glamorous watch in the world. It doesn’t claim that persons of the opposite sex will immediately fall in love with you once they spot that you are wearing it. It doesn’t even look that attractive. In fact it is big and black and fairly ugly, a little like Mike Tyson chewing a piece of Evander Holyfield’s ear.

This is the “Fergie watch”. A brand new wrist clock that will always show the time you want. Read the rest of this entry »

Sir Alex To Take On A New Role?

Posted: November 14, 2015 in Football, Opinion, Sir Alex Ferguson
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Instead of jetting around the world promoting his books and lecturing on what it’s like to be a cross between Alexander the Great and Winston Churchill, I think Sir Alex Ferguson should consider a steady job. There are some available, but this is my question;

Should he audition for the role of James Bond?

Is he too old? Not really, he’s a bit past the norm but David Niven was 57 when he played Bond in “Casino Royale” and Sean Connery was 53 when he made his comeback in “Never Say Never Again”.

When Ian Fleming changed James Bond’s parentage to reflect the fact that he was now being played by a Scotsman thanks to Sean Connery’s performance in Dr No, he inadvertently did Fergie a favour. Read the rest of this entry »

England And The Meaningless Friendlies, (Part II)

Posted: November 14, 2015 in England, Football, International Football
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Loyal followers of these chronicles will be aware that, in the very recent past, I wrote about the folly of meaningless international friendly matches, particularly at a time when the Premier League table is starting to take on a meaningful shape.

For any loyal followers who just happened to miss the first part, here it is.

I also wrote about it back in August of 2014, for Pundit Arena, if anyone is interested, here that is as well.

My doubt about these games is focused on what purpose they actually serve. Other than teaching uninformed coaches things about their team blatantly obvious to everybody else, and running the risk of injuring players who may be vital to their club’s title challenge, what is the aim? Read the rest of this entry »

Jose Mourinho To Manchester United?

Posted: November 11, 2015 in Football, Jose Mourinho, Managers, Opinion, Premier League
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(A cheerful looking Mourinho reacts positively to the news that Real Madrid would quite like him back)

Someone, somewhere, started a rumour. The rumour spread and began to take some shape. The rumour was now being believed and seen as possibly true. The rumour then becomes a story in the national press, who don’t really care whether or not there is any truth in it, as long as somebody buys the paper.

Here is the national press not really caring.

When I read the story originally my first reaction was to check the date. Satisfied that I hadn’t been asleep for five months and it wasn’t April 1st, I looked for proof that I wasn’t hallucinating. No, no sign of any strange coloured mushrooms or green tobacco anywhere. There were the usual empty bottles, but not enough to send me this far over the edge. Therefore, I must be sober, (or as sober as anyone can be nowadays), and what I am reading must have some substance, however tenuous, or it couldn’t be printed.

So Jose Mourinho has an agreement to take over at Manchester United when Louis van Gaal rides off with his damsel into the sunset of the Algarve in 2017. Read the rest of this entry »

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